Balancing my Circle

I want to write today, not about any particular topic, just write. The kids are on summer break and I am losing my mind. I’m currently in my 1-week break between terms for school. My weight loss has stalled. My mental health has stalled. Everything seems to be ehhh. But I’m happy with that. I’m officially going back to the basics and starting again. I had stretched and strained myself to do SO much that it was too much. So I’m back to bare bones. Work. School. Kids. This means no therapy. No gym. No exercise classes. No extra-curricular activities for the girls.

I have goals though. I’m taking this break and then I’m going to reintroduce things slowly but surely. Getting into a rhythm before adding something else.  Sometimes we have to do this—and that is okay. I promise. I’m not saying I will never do those things again, I’m saying I need to start over and figure out how much of what I actually need and balance that with my sanity. Because what good is getting physically healthy if you’re mentally sick? There has to be a balance and I’m working on finding that.  I wish I could do it all and more, but I can’t. And now I won’t even try. I was setting myself up for failure and that was putting me into a depressive state. As opposed to feeling accomplished for what I was completing, I was feeling down about what I wasn’t and stressed because of the toll it took to complete those things. This is not a state anyone should be in.

I tried changing my mind set—yes I was accomplishing things. But my body was paying for it. From my weightloss stall to my constant headaches and frequent naps, my body was telling me to chill the hell out. And I listened. Because our bodies should be a priority. And I’m making my body a priority. I still work out at home, and even better I incorporate the kids—they LOVE it.  When they see me pull out my yoga mat they immediately come running.

So the point of this article is to listen to your body. Balance your life thoroughly, don’t focus on just one aspect. If your physical health begins to deteriorate due to what you’re doing for your mental do less of it or change it up and vice versa. And remember, there are more than just your physical and mental wellbeing. I’ve read many articles throughout my schooling and most agree there are at least 4 aspects–mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual. For me my circle isn’t divided equally between the 4, but it is a full circle because I do work on all 4. Mental and Physical are about 70% of my circle, emotional is about 20% and spiritual is only about 10%. Once I get my mental and physical under control my circle will shift. The goal is to have 4 equal quarters. Maybe someday I’ll get there.

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